Contact Naps 101
Contact naps are always a hot topic with my clients! Some absolutely love contact naps. Others feel trapped by them and long for independent sleep. Both feelings are completely valid and can exist simultaneously.
In this blog we will answer the question, “Are contact naps ‘spoiling’ my baby?”. We will also cover how to practice independent naps and what it means if your baby won’t sleep independently at all (even at night).
Are contact naps "spoiling” my baby?
Newborns: Let me very clear. You CANNOT spoil a newborn! Rocking your newborn to sleep or implementing frequent contact naps with your newborn is NOT going to ruin their future independent sleep skills. Before 4 months, babies are not able to learn to self-soothe consistently. This means that they will most likely need some extra help from you to get to sleep. You can rock them to sleep, implement contact naps, wear them in a carrier, etc. without worrying about “ruining” them or “spoiling” them.
4+ Months: But what about older babies? If your older baby has already learned the skill of independent sleep initiation, then occasional contact naps will not wreck their independent sleep skills. If you start doing contact naps frequently or if your baby has not learned independent sleep skills, your baby can learn to rely on them.
Practicing Independent Newborn Naps
While contact naps can be beautiful and enjoyable, it can also feel overwhelming if your baby will only nap in your arms. It is really normal for a newborn to want contact naps. But it is totally ok to start practicing independent naps as well. Here are my top tips for implementing some independent naps with your newborn.
Swaddle. Your baby’s startle reflex is very strong at this age. Newborns tend to jerk, squirm, startle, and wake themselves up frequently. It is important to swaddle them nice and snug before laying them down for a nap.
Follow their age-appropriate wake windows and sleepy cues. Getting your baby down for a nap before they become overtired will make it much easier to successfully implement an independent nap.
Transfer carefully. Once you have your baby swaddled, you can rock them fully to sleep. When transferring them into the crib or bassinet, you want to hold them on their side and close to your body for as long as possible before laying them down. Lay your baby down on their side first, then slowly roll them to their back. Keep your hand on their chest or jostle them back and forth for a minute to ensure that they stay asleep. You can also practice laying them down drowsy and jostling them to sleep in the bassinet.
Practice in the morning. The first nap of the day is usually the first to solidify and is the easiest one to practice an independent nap. As the day goes on, it is very normal for independent naps to become trickier.
Help your baby extend naps. Try not to be discouraged by short independent naps. Even 20-30 minutes in the bassinet is a win. When you can, rock your baby back to sleep if they wake up after a short nap (less than an hour). You can try laying them back down or finish off with a contact nap.
Struggling with newborn sleep? Click the button below to check out my 0-4 Months Sleep Essentials Guide.
Independent Naps for Older Babies
But what about babies who are older than 4 months? If contact naps are working for you, there is absolutely nothing wrong with continuing them past the 4 month mark. A sleep habit only becomes a “bad” habit if it is unsafe or no longer sustainable for you. If you are ready to move away from contact naps and/or experiencing short naps, frequent night wake-ups, and a harder time getting your baby to sleep, it is the perfect time to teach independent sleep initiation skills!
I work with families to create individualized step-by-step plans to optimize baby’s daytime sleep, teach independent sleep initiation, lengthen naps, and cut down on night awakenings. Each plan is tailored to fit the needs and wants of every family. Click the button below to explore my services.
What if my baby ONLY sleeps in my arms, even at night?
If you are doing your best to follow my top 8 tips for laying a solid sleep foundation (you can learn about these in my next workshop), your newborn should be able to sleep at least a couple hours at a time in their bassinet or crib. If this is not happening for you, tummy issues could be the culprit. Tummy discomfort can keep your newborn up at night and can be caused by things such as lip/tongue tie, gas, reflux, and intolerances.
If your newborn is not sleeping independently at night, I highly recommend attending my next workshop or scheduling a consult. I also recommend contacting your pediatrician to help rule out the tummy issues listed above.